Dating As A Broke Student

(Opinion Piece by Phillip Iilonga)

As a less fortunate student, dating can be a challenge. New students mostly start their journey with the mental state of discovery, but when it comes to dating it's like playing a video game on hard mode with low quality. You're trying your best but resources are always low and run out at the worst time. As a guy, there’s always a silent pressure to be the provider, the planner and the one who makes everything look effortless. Meanwhile, your wallet doesn’t even have enough money to pay for your haircut.

One of the biggest challenges is the expectation that dating must involve money and social media doesn’t help, it's full of expensive dinners, fancy gifts, and perfect date nights that look like movie scenes. But the reality of most students is very different. You're balancing tuition, transport, food and some other obligations. So when you like someone, you immediately start calculating costs instead of just feelings. “Will I be able to pay for her hair and nails this month?” becomes an internal debate.

Another struggle is pride. Many guys don’t want to admit to the fact that they're broke, especially when they are trying to impress someone they like. You want to look stable and capable and not like someone that has to check prices before buying something. But pretending to have money you don’t have is a fast way to create stress and even debts. Eventually, you realize that honesty is cheaper and far more peaceful.

On the positive side, being broke forces creativity. Instead of expensive dates, you learn to value simplicity, long walks, deep conversations, movie nights with just a phone and a pack of chips, studying together and just laughing about life. Ironically, those low-cost experiences often create stronger bonds because they focus on connection rather than performance.

Dating while broke also teaches you to look for the right person. Someone who understands your situation and appreciates effort over money. When a girl respects your hustle and doesn’t measure your wealth by your wallet, it feels refreshing and real. It becomes less about impressing and more about growing together.

However, there are emotional challenges too. Sometimes you feel inadequate, especially when comparing yourself to other guys that seem financially stable. You might worry about not being enough for your partner. But being a student means you're still building your future. Your value isn’t just your current income, it’s your ambition, your character and how you treat people.

In the end, dating as a broke student teaches you humility, honesty and patience. It reminds you that love doesn’t have to come from your wallet but from your heart for it to be meaningful. If anything, the struggle filters out superficial expectations and leaves space for genuine connection. As a guy, you learn that being thoughtful, respectful and emotionally present can matter more than having money.

And maybe one day, when you're no longer broke, you’ll look back and realize those simple student dates were some of the most real moments you ever experienced.

Phillip Iilonga is a Level 2 Boiler making student  at Windhoek Vocational Training Centre (WVTC). You can find Phillip on Instagram, @phillipwrldwide