Navigating Fake Friendships in University

(By:Ann-Kathrin Eises)

Ann-Kathrin Eises, is the Student Representative Council (SRC) for Gender and Social Welfare at the International University of Management (IUM) in Windhoek. Here, she shares her input of how students can navigate friendships while in University: At IUM, one of the best ways to build genuine friendships is by getting involved in campus life.

Joining different societies, participating in SRC initiatives, volunteering, sporting, study groups, and attending activities like worship nights and prayer days help students connect with others who share similar values and interests. Because our university promotes Christian leadership and community, friendships tend to grow stronger when built on respect, kindness, and mutual support rather than convenience. Being authentic and consistent really helps relationships last.

An unhealthy friendship often leaves you feeling drained, pressured, or unappreciated. If someone only comes to you when they need something, constantly criticizing you, gossiping, or encouraging behavior that goes against your values or goals, those are warning signs. At IUM, we are guided by integrity,respect and compassion, so friendships should refl ect those same principles.

If a relationship affects your peace or distracts you from your growth, it may not be healthy. University life can sometimes create friendships of convenience for notes, assignments or social status instead of genuine connection. Many students are trying to fit in or adjust to a new environment, which can lead to surface level relationships. However IUM’s culture, shaped by faith-based values and strong leadership from like our Reverend Dean of Students Dr. E. Nangolo and our Chancellor Bishop Dr Shekutaamba Väinö-Väinö Nambala, encourages sincerity and character.

That environment reminds us to choose meaningful, honest friendships over temporary ones. I would encourage students to communicate how they feel and set clear expectations. If the situation doesn’t improve, it’s okay to step back and protect your space. Not every friendship is meant to last, and that’s okay. Surround yourself with people who support your goals, check in on your wellbeing, and celebrate your success. You deserve friendships that uplift you, not ones that exhaust you. Setting boundaries means knowing your worth and being comfortable saying no when something doesn’t feel right.

At IUM, we talk a lot about servant leadership, but not serving others should never mean sacrifi cing yourself. Students can set boundaries by fi rst being clear about what they are comfortable with and what they are not. Communicating honestly and calmly is important. Healthy friendships will respect your limits. Boundaries are not selfi sh; they are a form of self-care and self respect.

You can find Ann-Kathrin on Instagram @eisesann